It’s To Quiet In Here…So I’m Going to Rant About Something

[ennuipoet]

Now, I don’t want to get off on a rant here (Does anyone remember when Dennis Miller was funny and not a creepy Neo-Con?) but is it necessary to apply a Hipstamatic Filter to every photo taken with with your phone? Seriously, does a blurry out of focus shot with no existent depth of field and mediocre composition become an iconic work of art because you add filter? Furthermore, your phone is already taking bad photos (note: I am blaming the phone) by adding a digital rendition of the same effect one could achieve by simply using a cheap plastic camera well known for taking bad photos seems redundant, could one not simply take bad photos on the actual camera? Are we so bereft of originality as a culture that poor color toning, chromatic aberration and crinkly border designed to evoke nostalgia for by gone days of plastic lenses and rotating flash bulbs are now considered creative excellence? Honestly, no amount of over saturation and faux Polaroid finish is going to make that shot of your dog any more interesting to the rest of us. Stop it, just stop it. If you want photographs which resemble those taken with an archaic, inferior camera on film left sitting in the back of a ’73 Honda Civic while you followed the Dead around for three years then go on Ebay, spend seven dollars for the camera and take the photo with that! It’s not hard, your dog will still be doing that uninteresting thing it does you feel compelled to spam out Facebook pages with while you try to figure out the complex photo mechanics of a Kodak Instamatic!

(I sincerely apologize to anyone who uses Hipashitamatic Filters, and if any of you still think Dennis Miller is funny.)

[orionid]

No offense, but I did read that in Dennis Miller’s voice. 😀

/Mostly agree. I hate hipstamatic, use that $7 old camera, groan at 2/3’s of the photos that come out of it, and keep going back because it’s fun. Then I’ll go make an over-processed HDR just to piss everyone else off. 😛

Oh, and while we’re on the topic of ranting. I fucking hate gas grills. There’s no bottom-end temperature control (three days ago, I melted my meat thermometer with a single burner on “low” while burning the chicken in less than 20 minutes), they won’t smoke for shit, even when you pull up the grates and put your smoke pouch directly on the flame channel, and if the bottle runs dry halfway through cooking, you won;t know until you come out to check it when it should be almost done, and find a slab of raw pork shoulder sitting there, covered in flies that managed to sneak in through the cracks and absolutely no heat whatsoever.

Edit: Forgot to mention – I just got thrust into mod status of a large, high traffic, approval-only flickr group. And I’ve blatantly refused every hipstamatic shot posted, whether it met the theme or not.

[ennuipoet]

That’s OK, because Classic Miller was awesome! And while I understand the convenience and quick cook of the gas grill, I feel the charred on one side, raw on the other ash laden, fuel tasting goodness of the tradition charcoal grill will always be a superior grilling experience.

Good grief, I am channeling Sheldon Cooper! I’ve got to stop marathon-ing Big Bang Theory!

[Kestrana]

It’s “too”.

/rant

[nobigdeal]

It’s “too”.

/rant

HAHAHA!!

[Uranus]

Happiness is not an ideal of reason, but of imagination.

/Kant

[lokisbong]

I refuse to even take pictures with a cell phone camera. My current cell doesn’t even have a camera. I got the second cheapest phone the store carried. I agree with Orionid on the grill debate. You need to get one of those chimney things to light the briquettes and never taste fuel again. And I don.’t use the grill when it gets real windy so have never had the ash covered food thing yet.

[Yoyo]

Holy moley! This is so funny. I was checking out their website, because I couldn’t believe that it was actually called HipstaMatic. That makes it even funnier. Plus, the testemonials there are even ironic in an unintended was. The only one that looks even remotely legitimate is Margret Cho, because I feel that she’s trying to be ironic. The others, HA!

“It makes just about anything look amazing.” Jen, Mineapolis Designer. I’m not sure what Mineapolis is, but I wouldn’t ask Jen to design anything else. Or did they mean Minneapolis?
“This S!@# is so dope.” Alan, Photographer. Not for my graduation, portrait, or anything else, he’s not.
“I don’t need to do psychadellics anymore now that I have Hipstamatic.” Nancy, Mommy Blogger. Ha! Are your kids really that boring, to other doting mothers even, that you need SFX?

Finally, I must confess, to you my Farktographers and Farketts, that I did brouse the Holga Direct web site in the past. However, the price was the only think I found attractive about them.

[Kestrana]

Holgas can be fun as a novelty. It’s the people who make lomography SRS BSNS that annoy me.

Also, welcome to the forum!

[caradoc]

You need to get one of those chimney things to light the briquettes and never taste fuel again.

“Briquettes?”

Our charcoal comes in “chunks” in 50lb bags a buddy of mine gets from somewhere. Mesquite wood real charcoal. 😀

[lokisbong]

You need to get one of those chimney things to light the briquettes and never taste fuel again.

“Briquettes?”

Our charcoal comes in “chunks” in 50lb bags a buddy of mine gets from somewhere. Mesquite wood real charcoal. 😀

That’s why I didn’t capitalize it. I knew some people prefer real wood charcoal. I have a hard time finding real stuff around here so use the plain old style “briquettes” Name brand only, the generic offerings never seem to burn no matter what I did to them.

[Curious]

i love my gas grill. it does what i need efficiently and effectively. i’ve had pretty much every kind of charcoal grill made including a home built brick thing. the gas grill overall works best for how i use an outdoor grill.

i over bought when i got it since it has three burners inside, one outside and a rotisserie and usually i just use one or two burners. at the time i had the money and i’m glad i got it.

[Author]

Posts