I have neither staples nor stitches. I have a vacuum.
And while I’m using my lovely vacuum friend, I can’t take showers except for just before the nurses come to change things around, about every three days. So I have to stand with one foot in the tub and one out and wash my hair and shit.
When I can take a full shower, the doc encourages me to put on a glove and soap up the site. I’m three weeks out now, so there’s no pain, but it is decidedly weird to be sticking your finger into your leg.
I’ve been having a fun time with stasis ulcers and general vascular collapse for about a year now. It’s soooooo weird to have giant holes in your body.
It’s also a lot of fun trying to tell your boss that, you know, you kinda need a place to toss a pile of bloody gauze every night. I’m fine, perfectly fine, don’t fire me, just, you know, I sorta kinda need to dispose of a cubic yard of bloody mess and might be longer than 15 minutes on my breaks.
Farktography has gotta start doing charity or something to get our karma back in whack. We seem pretty cursed as a lot.
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