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Every so often I try to talk myself into a newer, fancier camera. I look at the resolution and think “nah, I’ve never needed a couple million more pixels” or “Another 15 AF points? Psh, if I was that picky I’d just do it manually” or “pentaprisms are nice, but not $300 nice”…
At the end of the day, I’m happy with what I have.

But this cock-biting fruit of a shit-fucking whore’s Crohn’s-ravaged prolapsed anus’s 95% viewfinder coverage has dusted my doilies this contest.

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I like to picture the gas station attendant as an older woman muttering something like “Weeelp, I guess if you boys wanna save yurselves the mo-tel fees tain’t nunna my bidness. Leroy’s the one to hafta clean it, and he keeps on spittin that tabbaccy all over the cee-ment and listening t’ those profanity songs so I reckon he won’t be bothered none.”
Then watches as U-Man. And he waits for the other guy to leave. And waits. Then ends up calling 911, terrified that U-Man tortured, killed and photographed a gay drifter.

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I joked about this earlier, but now that I am on the edge of picking shots I have to ask: Film is OK for this correct?

I read that as pickling shots, immediately googled pickling film and spent a good 15 minutes trying to figure out if that was some hip alternative wash process in film developing, or if you were going to transfer the image while pickling sheet steel and have the shades of gray and such come from rust and various things other than how I could start reading better than a 2nd grader.

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psdisasters.com
It explains why all those people want limbs amputated, the media routinely promotes beauty as someone with a missing leg.

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In the old days (late 1990s) it was trendy to shape the lights so that the reflection in the eye would act as an added effect.
Example: heart

You can get non-flash (always on) LED ring lights with screw on adapters for all the popular sizes for like $30 these days.

(posted to post H!P video)

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Eyes that have a bright reflection in them (the not-pupil part, preferably iris) seem to pop more too. You can see it for yourself in the bathroom mirror with a flashlight.

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Are Fark Party pics okay?

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Fun fact, if you staple (instead of skewer with a toothpick) bacon to pickled melon, dried & stuff apricot, or pineapple, the fat will melt, the muscle will tighten, and you will nearly die after burning half of them and forgetting you stapled some twice.
(Individual results may vary, do not attempt at home if you’re the suing type)

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Nikon better than Canon? What planet are you guys on?

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So, one question remains: what do y’all want to do (if anything) about tracking Funny votes?

Could you represent the votes as wagging internet penises?
Regular contest votes would be length, funny would be width, and smart would be how vigorously it’s wagged. Then you could add herpetic lesions when people break a rule, a wart if they vote whore with kids or boobs, and a syphlitic chancre if they don’t vote for anyone else.

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If you just want to trigger them, you can get really long flash cords and a splitter dirt cheap.

I’ve run 3 from a generic Chinese hotshoe adapter with no problem at all.
You could run the cords from a light sensor trigger in the path of your flash, if you don’t want to run around with 50 cords hanging from your camera.

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O.O how in the heck is that possible?

BECAUSE WE ARE AWESOME!

The short answer is we still suck at judging the worth of internet coverage.

The long answer is that NatGeo has about 4.5 million subscribers, and Fark.com has a lot more monthly hits than that. Fark also gets a bump up in value for being a “media influencer”, another bump up for being “social media” and yet another bump for its Alexa ranking. Then you have to remember the difference between ad value equivalency and publicity value, which is why they won’t give you money.

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Also, as a side note, part of my job is calculating the publicity value of forum posts and google plus and all that crap. According to our publicity value calculator, any mention in a farktography thread is worth $32,150.
A half page mention in National Geographic is worth $32,825.25

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Titles are a tool available to photographers. If it can affect how the audience appreciates it, it’s a useful tool.
If you want people to like your stuff, you have to give them what they want. Even when you can change someone’s tastes, you can’t do it quickly.
Popularity is a poor measure of quality, but it’s a useful measure in itself. Take it as a challenge to find what else you can display, convey or express in your photography other than your photograph.
It’s sort of the ultimate challenge to take something you think should be opposed and work with it until you’ve found a place for it in your work.

(Says the guy who thinks this is artful expression, and cries every time he watches it. *sniffle sniff*)

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It completely escaped me that people buying stuff to put in their homes is probably what most photos are bought for.
I only go look at prints in museums, and the idea of a photo on the wall is as crazy to me as a fresco. Everything makes a lot more sense now, thanks.

I also eat that note explaining crap up. EAT IT UP.
UIC’s psych building has a bunch of it on the walls, like iron slabs made to rust and patina with the “artist”‘s blood sweat and tears; or another where a scene was painted with quickly decaying pigments, so over the course of the semester the image changed completely. I’d like it as a theme, you know “demonstrate nuance and/or an effect/result photographically of something that could be a euphemism or cliche if we did not have language.” Even if it sucked, we could threaten to blow the heads of another 5,000 syntax Nazis every week unless I got my own island, recognized as an independent US protectorate. You guys could hang out on weekends.

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