[U-Man]

Having my first good idea in months + not having a functioning camera = fail

Sadness ensues…

Dude. Sadness indeed. 🙁

While my girls are giving me gray hair, they are sort of nice to have around for a theme like this.

[U-Man]

The one I did last night is more of the impending disaster type. It’s OK. We’ll see if I get better pics and cull it out.

[U-Man]

My wife is awesome. The past couple of weeks I have been uninspired with farktography. Tonight she and I talked about this theme. First, she thought I was a complete geek for understanding what it is about. But then she came up with some really good ideas. FAIL seems easier to think up than WIN.

I just tried a I LIKE WHERE THIS THREAD IS GOING (my own idea) and it might work. I’ll try her’s tomorrow or Tuesday ’cause they involve kids.

[U-Man]

Just wait until Friday when some folks are back in the office and feeling depressed about it.

I find the variety of subjects interesting and enjoyable this week.

[U-Man]

Can do. Maybe.

[U-Man]

Are the only three options: Win, Fail and I like where this thread is going?

I’ve seen others like “Welcome to Fark” or “This thread is useless without pictures (pitchers)” etc. in Fark threads. That would open it up some.

I have nothing in mind, just throwing out ideas.

[U-Man]

I really like this theme but life has conspired against me and I have nothing. I’m pretty sure that the idea is to take specific pics for the theme. If I don’t get any between now and go-time, would an archive search for photos that “fit’ be OK?

/I’d be cool if that doesn’t work. It would probably be healthy for me to skip one of these weeks anyway. 🙂
//you down with OCD. Yeah, you know me.
///…sorta like another way to call a cat a kitty…is a great lyric
////aaaaand I’m going back to work.

[U-Man]

I thought a nano was a really tiny unit of measurement.

/or maybe an mp3 player.
//cringes at the thought of writing 1000’s of words in addition to the rest on my plate.

[U-Man]

🙂 Fuck off to the both of you. 🙂

/obviously, typed while smiling

[U-Man]

I was going to take a shot of my under-table set-up last night but I forgot. I don’t have the energy to repeat it now.

But here are a bunch of goofy ass self portraits –

http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/U_8797.jpg
http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/U_8799.jpg
http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/U_8800.jpg
http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/U_8801.jpg
http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/U_8802.jpg
http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/U_8803.jpg
http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/U-Man_8796.jpg
http://photos.imageevent.com/ulle17/fark/Us_8823.jpg

I think I look like a dwarf in 8803.

[U-Man]

I had one idea and one night. Three similiar pics and I don’t know if I’ll submit all three. I definitely went with the ‘distort’ part of the description.

[U-Man]

I’ll stop after this one – this was another e-mail – but has anybody seen this faulty design? LMAO.

[U-Man]

An e-mail I got recently….

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, ‘Well, I’m off now. The man should be here soon.’

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. ‘Good morning, Ma’am’, he said, ‘I’ve come to…’

‘Oh, no need to explain,’ Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, ‘I’ve been expecting you.’

‘Have you really?’ said the photographer. ‘Well, that’s good. Did you know babies are my specialty?’

‘Well that’s what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat !.

After a moment she asked, blushing, ‘Well, where do we start?’

‘Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.’

‘Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn’t work out for Harry and me!’

‘Well, Ma’am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I’m sure you’ll be pleased with the results.’

‘My, that’s a lot!’, gasped Mrs. Smith..

‘Ma’am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I’d love to be In and out in five minutes, but I’m sure you’d be disappointed with that.’

‘Don’t I know it,’ said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. ‘This was done on the top of a bus,’ he said.

‘Oh, my God!’ Mrs.. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

‘And these twins turned out exceptionally well – when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.’

‘She was difficult?’ asked Mrs.. Smith.

‘Yes, I’m afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look’

‘Four and five deep?’ said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement..

‘Yes’, the photographer replied. ‘And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling – I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.’

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. ‘Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh…equipment?’

‘It’s true, Ma’am, yes.. Well, if you’re ready, I’ll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away..’

‘Tripod?’

‘Oh yes, Ma’am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It’s much too big to be held in the hand very long.’
Mrs. Smith fainted

[U-Man]

Awesomeness from the Fark thread –

GoSurfing: /I’ve never posted anything under 500 kb

soosh: your three photos are:

gator.jpg – 123KB
DSC_0143_165.jpg – 95.6 KB
ownedscrubjay.jpg – 54.6 KB

[U-Man]

Dude. Notice the comment right above yours.

/I know, I know. They have what we want…

[Author]

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